Video: You’re Not Who She Said You Were

The week before this video was made, I told myself that I was going to prep this time. When I made that “Tell Your Story, Heal Your Body” video about a year ago, it was all on a whim. I told you my thoughts like we were sitting there, together. I wanted it to be different this time. I told myself that I had to prepare in advance. Advance meaning a few days before or the day before.

But then… a few days prior to our Saturday video session, I got triggered by something and was in the funkiest of funk funk funks. I felt so weird and off and didn’t want to prep for any videos until I felt myself again. The Funk lasted several days, all the way up into the morning of our Saturday video filming session.

I was not in the mood to make any videos whatsoever, but I knew that this is what I love to do. I said my mantras, my truth statements out loud, and told myself that I LOVE MAKING VIDEOS. Because I do. After the first video rolled around, The Funk was disintegrating. By the time we were done making videos, I felt back to myself again.

This was a very, very powerful lesson for me:

Keep doing what you love, even if you aren’t feeling the vibe. Even if The Funk is visiting you and you don’t feel like yourself.

Speaking truth out loud over myself + doing what I love = Funk-Be-Gone

I don’t mean to be all new-agey with saying the word mantra. A mantra is basically a truth statement, so whatever you want to call it.

Now, onto the video …

In the video, I talk about some words my mom called me when she got mad. I gave an example of what I believed about myself as a result. The example I gave was just one of the many ways her words impacted me. I believed many things about myself as a result of her words. To explain what I was trying to tell you, I used an example of one of the things I believed about myself as a result of this phrase. But there were more… that I’m a f’n loser, that I’m a f’n b—–. Basically, that I’m a rotten, horrible person. So there were and still are more truths for me to keep telling myself in response to the words my mom used towards me.

Some of the things our moms have told us have come packaged with lots of goodies. Unwrap one and you find another. There’s usually not one linear consequence to damaging words, but many that are all tangled up together and connected.

The biggest thing I want you to walk away with today is this (and I’m talking to those who had mothers who said “things”):

You’re not who she said you were.

As I mention in the video, talking about my mom is very hard on her. My mom is proud of my blog and she’s given it to a lot of her friends and co-workers. I am proud of her too — she gave me a lot of gifts, including who I am today. My mom managed very well for most of my childhood, given her own background of abuse and trauma. My mom’s mistakes are being used in me to help other people heal. Love you, Mom.

I hope this video gives you the truth you needed to hear.

What I really want you to work on is untangling who your mom said that you were and who you say that you are. Really need to separate those two. And, if you’re into God, you can take that a step further by writing down who God says that you are.

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